have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
And don't be too jealous. Drinking alone watching a chick flick and masturbating isn't nearly as glamorous as it sounds
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
I'm on strict orders from her to keep sleeping with you until you give her a job next summer.
Dude, you face planted, there was no "bar fight".
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
