just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
I recorded his drunk dial calls. My personal favorite was the one that began, "grab the bull by the horns and fuck his cock."
Going to pass out with da shoes on. hugging wallstreet journal from tuesday. please check me for liveliness in the morning.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
It may be a clusterfuck, but I'll be looking classy as shit as I watch the nightmare unfold
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
I doubt the gods of funday Sunday would exact such a high price... But it's good to know an afternoon with me is worth a left foot.
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