ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
Be still, my beating vagina.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
Honestly I really just want to do you in the mail truck. Thought about it a lot today
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
Randomize
