wakey wakey hands off snakey
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Just woke up to my stoned boyfriend building a shrine around my bare ass. He'll never leave me.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
There would be some who claim I got a little "carried away" or that we "probably don't need that many jello shots". They would be wrong.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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