Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
I just peed in the Schreyer honors college shrubbery. Thanks honors students, you're finally good for something
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
He? As in you personified your dick?
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
Randomize