Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
What's the appropriate I've been inside you but we're not technically dating valentines present?
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I woke up this morning hand cuffed to the bed with three bruised ribs and Amy written in lipstick on my chest... what happen lastnite??
Randomize
