i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
Howd you meet this guy?
I found him next to my pants on sunday morn.
So not only did you shoot down my invitation and prob walked past my house but now ur excluding me from a wet t shirt contest which btw i totally would have won
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
You’re welcome stay at my house. But, you gotta piss in the toilet
Randomize
