Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
For a whole 2 minutes you were convinced you were talking to my voicemail
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I just put on my bra while peeing. I fear this will be my big achievement of the day.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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