I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I met the perfect girl for you, she's smart, likes cars, has at least one ear, and really blue eyes!
please elaborate on, "atleast one ear"
I lost my keys but found four buffalo wings in my pockets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
I'm bleeding and have questions
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
Randomize