i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
at that time a 4 pound meatball stuffed with pizza rolls seemed more important than bailing you out of jail.... sorry.
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
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