the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
What's protocol when the 18 year old son of an anti-gay preacher sends you a message on Grindr during church?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
If I get one more "oh yaaaaa he changed your oil" texts, I'm gonna lose my shit
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
no fucks will be given and no pants will be worn
i'll bring the vodka
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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