I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
I don't even know. I woke up in the bathtub with no shirt, covered in towels holding what appeared to be vanillia pudding mixed with captain morgan.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
