He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
In college, I had one standard. Penis. A lot has changed since then. Now I really only have one standard. Breathing.
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
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