guys are not supposed to queef...right?
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
Trying to convince my mother to let me take some of my sisters Lortab to sell is not going well
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Is it good porn? Or is it more of that fucked up Cabbage Patch Doll porn you made us watch
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