I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
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