we're chasing vodka with high fives
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
thank you whoever used my nalgene as a flask. pregamin in chem
She said we "made love." I had to explain to her that when both parties agree that the first time time they have sex both people agree to video tape the whole thing its not "making love" but more like random good time fun sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I'm on tinder and every time somebody says something too creepy for me I start quoting scripture at them. My boobs are like missionaries.
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'm honored that you could tear yourself away from your girlfriend's vagina long enough to text me.
Handcuffs. Recoverd. I'm a goddamn detective.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
Randomize