I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
Just saw Youth in Revolt. There are only so many times Michael Cera can lose his virginity.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
Change of plans I'm coming home and shotgunning all the beer we have.
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
So both cops helped talk her into coming back into the bar and doing a shot with me. The main argument being, "a bar is no place to be sober!"
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
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