she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Dignity is for republicans.
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Why are all the dvds taped to the fish tank. Really.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
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