Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
It's just like riding a bike. Only it's a dude's face.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
Randomize
