# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
Mac n' cheese is coming out of my nose. You can't make that feel better
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Next time I try to break into the police station drunk, please stop me.
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