T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
After my mom met Tanner, she literally turned and said "he's from old money, top of his class at Emory, already has doctors courting him for jobs and judging from your vocal performance the other night, he's gifted in bed. Fake a pregnancy right now"
I come from her. Holy hell.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
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