I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Is it bad that I stopped wanting to fuck her as soon as I noticed she had dry skin?
I sometimes completely doubt that you're straight.
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Note to self: the judgement that occurs when unrolling your last 5 which was used to snort drugs the night before, to pay for alcohol before noon on a Monday is worth just sucking it up and taking an overdraft fee.
Wait a min, you had drugs last night?!
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
Randomize
