lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Remember don't think of it as being an alcoholic until something bad happens.
Think of it as Mythbusters for people who say you're going to get arrested or die
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
