Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
never play flip cup with pint glasses
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I can't name a single part of my body that isn't sore. Who says break up sex is bad sex?
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
I specifically remember rubbing my eyes thinking I could definitely go blind and I really like came to terms with it I was like ok my other senses will develop this is fine
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
Randomize
