What time do you think the pilgrims started drinking? I want to be as accurate as possible.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Remind me again why sleeping with a coworker and his wife would be a terrible idea.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I left the bar I'm on a bench across from the bowling alley taking a nap please come get me. I've had three lollipops.
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
If it's any consolation, I made really strong brownies yesterday and had 3 and then I saw demons
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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