if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
If we could never, ever tell mike i pissed in his closet, that would be really really great
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
So I'm at the VFW tonight and the shot special here is straight 151 for 2 dollars. They must hate our livers
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
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