It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
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