And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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