I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I don't not like him. It's just wierd talking to him because we both know I fucked his wife.
Can you bring me a corn dog or something shaped like one?
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
