Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
The police are arresting two women who got in a fight for the last Twilight DVD at Best Buy. Classic.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
So hungover that I might just sit in my car and wait until chipotle opens...in two hours...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Just realized that I indirectly pay for sex through my cable bill
Wow. He is an expensive lay
I still have to figure out the cost per lay. It could be a financially sound investment
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
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