Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
I wish the ER had shaved that part of my head. It would be easier to show people my staples at the bar.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
Randomize