Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
i just realized that the oil change sticker on my windshield is a day before the last time i had sex. I've driven exactly 10500 miles since.
you need to get laid.. and an oil change.
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
Randomize
