wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I've found my spirit animal. I'm a Snapple bottle. If you take my top off I'll tell you a fact about science.
Slept at my ex's best friends house while my ex was locked out and I walked by him sleeping in his car this am
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
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