Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
The shit I just took was four, very distinct colors. Jager night was a success
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
