Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
it felt like a thousand fairies were licking my balls.
I mean I gotta puke to be skinny, wax to be hairless, and drink to be fun. Life isn't easy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The cardboard box in my backseat wasn't strong enough to keep your pee contained. Come clean my car.
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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