The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Just because I don't want to be her booty call doesn't mean I wanna stop getting tit pics. I'm a sucker for double D's
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
WHY IS THE HAIRSPRAY SOUNDTRACK PLAYING IN THE LIQUOR STORE
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
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