love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I know. I need to get a vagina tranquilizer.
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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