Who has a tranny cab driver? I have a tranny cab driver.
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
I woke up while squatting on top of my bed peeing on my comforter and my laptop
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
She just broke down showed up grabbed a beer said fuck it pulled off her fake eyelashes looked at my roommate and said we need to break up you're a nice guy and I'm a whore
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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