the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
I just peed on my pajamas. Its gonna be a long night. Don't forget the cookies.
Worst PDA I've ever seen. She even licked the mustard off his mustach
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Nothing wrong with a little cat scratch fever. You have toys?
A few, plus a dildo molded from a porn star that I've always been too intimidated of to actually use, but it's the apocalypse, and momma didn't raise no quitter.
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