no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I have a critically important question to ask.
Why does watermelon-flavoured candy exist?
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I smell like playdoh, sex, and ruined lives. I love the weekend
We power houred with shots of red wine. Somehow we ended up with 7 bottles and lost Chris. Trying to find him this hungover is proving very unsuccessful.
Randomize
