im giving 12 year olds life advice. this is probably illegal somewhere.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
He just showed me how to break a chop stick with his ass.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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