my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
you dont have to exercise, you threw up last night!
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
I told my boyfriend my favorite food was strawberry poptarts, now my email inbox is getting spammed with nude pics of him with his dick in a poptart box..
Accidentally spilled a drink on her roommates skirt, offered to clean it, and got a blowjob out of the deal. Something went horribly right.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I woke up in someone's flat in Budapest and then got offered a free piercing before I left. Best. Hookup. Ever.
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
you know you're in deep when you watch fear and loathing in las vegas and every damn scene is relatable.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
