I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I wish I was that guy from the miller light commercials so I could walk into parties and take peoples beer without getting yelled at
I walked in on him cutting a hole in the condom.
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
its not like she's the last girl on the planet with symmetrical breasts and great skin
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
