Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
38 yer olds are good kisserssss
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
This is getting ridiculous. See/touch her boobs=good day. Not see/not touch her boobs=bad day. I am legitimately depressed over the lack of tits in my hands right now.
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Buying her a drink is like giving a seagull a French fry, all you're gonna do is get annoyed and shit on
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Randomize
