This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Sorry, I don't speak sober.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
He wants to play improv games now whenever he gets drunk. Sometimes I just do not have the energy for that kind of a thing
Randomize
