i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
Definitely locked eyes with the stripper who gave me a lapdance last night as she walked by me and into the Ann Taylor Loft in Times Square.
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Mike is so stoned. I just heard him quietly mutter to himself "rock a piss" as he walked down the hall to the bathroom
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Randomize
