Kareoke will never be a sober sport
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
I wish you could be here to assess my herpes before he gets here.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
