Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I made him drop me off at the wrong house waited for him to leave and crawled through several fences so he couldnt stalk me. How was your night?
So even though we broke up apparently according to my voice mail you still like me, with smurfs while riding on a boat.
When you accidentally type "I want Prince William to fuck me in the ass" to your mom there's really no way to take that back.
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
I just blew my weed a kiss
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I punched the bar tender after he cut me off. Hopped over the bar and made my own drink. That's how I got tazed
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
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