is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
BTW, it's bullshit to say that not doing a shot is unpatriotic. You know how I fall for that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
A hefty woman and I mean hefty shoved her number in my pocket at the gym without as much as a hello, winked and kept walking. Going to use your bed to defile her, don't want her to know where I live or have my neighbors see! Thanks, you're a pal!
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
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