i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
if i wake u up at 5am tmrw by coming into ur room wearing nothing but my indiana jones hat and purple socks while singing 'courtesy of the red white + blue' will u be pleased or annoyed
keep in mind this isn't open to negotiation, i'm just trying to gauge ur reaction
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
why is my clorox wipe dispenser full of tortillas?
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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