your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
Holding your hair back while you puked wasn't a choice. I was handcuffed to you.
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
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